My first Christmas away from home, I was 23, living in Japan at the time on a contract that restricted me from leaving the country for my first 12 months. I was scheduled to work on Christmas day and for a split second I felt sorry for myself. My sister was growing up and creating an adult friendship with my brother, he had a new serious relationship and I hadn’t even met her yet, and I was feeling so isolated from my family. However,  it didn’t take long for my optimism to kick in to realize that I was literally living out a dream by being in Japan, having an incredible job and several loving friends who would also be away from their loved ones for the holidays. I had a lot to be grateful for and although I would certainly miss my family, it was an opportunity to spend the Holidays in a totally new way. So if you’re finding yourself in a similar circumstance, I wrote this blog for you, and have some pretty awesome suggestions if I don’t say so myself! 

That year in Japan, my co-workers and I decided that everyone would bring something to work on Christmas day to represent a tradition from home. Our cast at Disney was from all over the world, so we had traditions from Europe, Australia, and the Americas! I remember someone brought in an entire waffle maker to work because that’s what their family ate every year on Christmas morning. I honestly could not have imagined a more magical place to spend Christmas away from my family. It was one of the most beautiful Christmas days I’ve had and all of the people I spent it with are still incredibly important to me to this day. They actually still feel like a different kind family to me. 

I spent over two years in Japan. At times, I felt very alone, but it allowed me to become comfortable doing things by myself and showed me how important friendship/community truly is. I remember watching an episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race and Rupaul made a beautiful statement about how our friends become our chosen family. There are wonderful people all around us but it is up to us to seek them out and nurture those relationships.

I’ve realized how common it is for young adults to be either physically or emotionally distant from their familes which can make the holidays a tough time in general. Whether you feel alone in your own hometown or if you’re actually alone and half way across the world, here are some ideas of new traditions for you and the life you have for yourself moving forward!The end of the year should be a time to celebrate with the ones you love regardless if it is considered “traditional” or not! At the end of the day, please remember no matter how lonely the holidays may feel for you, you are not alone. Let’s take the narrative into our own hands and find ways to feel joy no matter what the holidays look like for you this year. 

1. End of Year Brunch - This is such a fun tradition to start with your closest friends or family. Select your favorite diner or brunch spot close to home and send out your “First Annual Brunch” text inviting everyone to join you in celebration of another year of friendship. Add it in a calendar invite that reoccurs every year, so you hold yourself accountable for next year too!

2. Holiday Movie Marathon - The Friday before Christmas, everyone brings a blanket, snack and beverage to binge on cheesy holiday classics!

Some classics include: Home Alone, The Holiday, Love Actually, The Family Stone, Little Women, The Elf & I will admit this to you but love me those cheesy Hallmark movies once I’ve gone through my movie rotation! 

3. A Family Digital Gift Exchange - This is perfect for long distance families. Arrange a gift exchange in advance and set a zoom date and time to all meet up and open gifts together to help feel together when you’re technically all apart! 

4. Virtual Book Club - I did this with a bunch of women in 2020. We read meaningful books and then met up over zoom to discuss the topics. This can be a bit of work, but if you’re looking to stay in touch with your long distance besties or family over the holidays, this is a great way to spend time together even from a distance!

5. Annual Drive to A Scenic View - Take a day trip. Invite some close friends or do a solo day trip to take in the view. I like the idea of having a place you visit just once a year with friends, or alone, to take in the moment! 

6. Volunteer - To quote Glennon Doyle, “Find what breaks your heart and that will be your purpose.” If you don’t have anyone in particular to spend the holidays with, you will never regret using that day to serve others.

Ultimately, it’s up to you how you want to spend your holidays. We all know it can be a joyous time but for some people, it can also feel lonely. I want to encourage you to find ways to make the holidays special and relevant for you in this season of life. Let me know below or in the Facebook group if you have any interesting friends/family traditions!